There are up and down moments in my class.
I am emotionally drained every single day.
Most of the days in the week are difficult.
But, there are also days when I know God answers my prayers and telling me exactly why I am here.
One of my boys, J, shows rebellious behaviors, disrespect, and all the bad stuff you can imagine. Another teacher kept on telling me “bless your heart” every time we talked about this boy. Whatever that means. I won’t give up on any of my students. Not then, not now!
J always talks back to me, denying everything I said, saying the opposite of what I am saying, resisting to do his work, etc. Whenever I said that I believe in him and that there is good in him, he would always deny it, saying “no! no! there is no good in me.”
Whenever I said I pray for him, he had a very bad attitude. It’s breaking my heart. He said that he won’t change. Pray won’t work. Let’s see if God answer your prayer. I told him that he is not fighting against me, but against God. One day, I confront him for what he did wrong. He said the same thing about prayer asking me to stop praying for him. Then I answered him, “you can’t stop me. I am not praying to you. I am praying to God.” Then, he went silent. He had teary eyes.
I learned that he is a sensitive young man, smart, creative, curious, humorous, and loves to read. I don’t know what made him the way he is now.
One day last week, I asked my students to write what fruit of the Spirit characterize them. I would never guessed that J would write these:
I shed tears and smiled big. This is the first time he admitted that there is good in him. God does answer prayer! In His own way. All of those time I keep on telling J that there is good inside him, he denied it but I believe he took it into his mind. Seed planted not in vain.
There was a day like last Thursday when none of my students got warning sign written on the board for doing something negative. Even J didn’t talk back, he was like other “supposedly well-behaved” kids in the class. That was one beautiful day when ALL my students succeed in behavior and in academic for the day. Even my student, M, said that she was happy that day. That is unusual because she is a gloomy girl with schizophrenic symptoms.
There is a long story behind this story. A story of walking with God in this new adventure and calling of mine. I can’t write all in here.
Miracles do happen! God is working! And I am grateful.